Some people have no scents at all

Drying off after my bath

Smell is a really important sense to us dogs, and yes, even to us wippitts, in spite of being labelled 'sighthounds': a fact that the Madwoman seems to regularly forget. We're sure she means well, but sometimes she goes too far, and being forced to take a bath is definitely not a nice thing to do.

Apart from the fact that we just don't like getting wet (you should see the Madwoman trying to persuade us to go out for a pee when it's raining - as she gently but firmly pushes our back ends out, the front is already coming back indoors again) a bath removes the wondrous and complex layers of smell which announce 'This is Archie!' (or Angel). She obviously doesn't appreciate the time and effort involved in restoring the smell. The equivalent for her would probably be like going round with her head in a bag, so no-one could see her face. Although some might say that would be an improvement.

Fortunately baths don't happen too often. Unfortunately one happened today. Archie found a deliciously aromatic pile of poo and managed to have a good wriggle around in it before the Madwoman spotted what he was up to and ran towards him waving her arms and screeching. We politely stood to one side to let her take a turn but she didn't seem inclined to, and rather meanly, wouldn't let Angel have a go either.

As soon as we got home she whooshed Archie up the stairs and into the bath where she proceeded to scrub him with Neem shampoo, effectively removing both his own doggy smell and every trace of the masterpiece he was carrying on his back.
For that's exactly what it was, and which the Madwoman, with her pathetically puny sense of smell also fails to appreciate. Smells for us are the equivalent of paintings to humans; just as you display them on your walls, we display them on our bodies where we can share them with others and continue to enjoy them ourselves.

Giving Archie a bath was more than an affront to his dignity, it was an artistic sacrilege. Would you take paint stripper to a Michelangelo or a Titian?