Thursday, 19 January 2017

More languishing

The languishing goes on ...
Angel had a couple of better days allowing us to go visit the Madwoman's horse
Flash at the weekend, but is now back to doing gloopy poopies and - not surprisingly - feeling rather pants.
We are thinking of setting up a pressure group to make the government ban colitis.
In the meantime the Madwoman is busy cooking vats of sweet potato
and this morning had to do a quick dash out to Tesco to buy more turkey mince.
So if we are a bit erratic with our blogs, bear with us:
not only do we have languishing to contend with,
we also have the Madwoman's cooking ...
Our very own turkey mountain
We had to come out to the kitchen to ask the Madwoman
to get a move on with making our lunch.
If you ask us, the room service is getting a bit slack around here
She's not really up to speed on the laundry either.
This used to be a pair of furry slippers.

Monday, 9 January 2017


Angel has been poorly again, doing spectacularly gloopy and bloody poops, and scaring the Madwoman half to death. She has raided the local shops for sweet potato and chicken to make special convalescent dishes ... and of course we both have to partake as it would be mean for one of us to not get the yummy fresh cooked chicken ...
It is very welcome after the supply of turkey running out ...

 in the meantime we are thinking about putting "a year's supply of turkey" on our next Christmas list to Santa, to ensure that the Madwoman has no excuse for not making it a regular feature of our daily menu ... 

Sunday, 1 January 2017

Going cold turkey

 It's a disgrace!
Run out of turkey?
Let's hope this isn't going to set the tone for the new year.
When we wake up, we expect you to have cooked us some more ...

Monday, 26 December 2016

Belated Christmas greetings!

So there we were, all ready to broadcast our Christmas message to the nation, and then the Madwoman in true Grinch style said she wasn't going to turn the interweb on during Christmas day.
So we are sorry it is late, but here it is now:

Have fun.
Be kind to everyone.

(Actually we nicked it from John Finnemore's ultimate bucket list,
but it is so good we thought we'd steal and then repeat it)

And now we are off to watch the Madwoman swabbing down the kitchen.
We could have told her it wasn't a good idea to turn the half-full bottle of Bucks Fizz upside down to mix up the contents.
No matter how gently it was done.
But who would have thought it would be quite that lively?
Very few parts of the kitchen have escaped.
We're thinking it is maybe karma for not letting us
do our Christmas broadcast yesterday.

Sunday, 18 December 2016

Wrapping tips

We have been picking up tips on how to wrap
awkwardly shaped presents while on our walks at
Chiltern Open Air Museum, and thought we'd pass on some of them ...
If you run out of paper, it's amazing what you can do
with a tarpaulin.
And rope is perfectly acceptable as a substitute for sellotape.
Use ladders to hold your tarpaulin down while you tie it into place.
Always leave the head sticking out if you gift wrap a horse.

Thursday, 15 December 2016

Getting ready!

We have been a bit busy getting ready for Christmas,
which has made us a little late posting our blog.
Exercising the Madwoman too ...
First of all there has been practicing the working-up-of-an-appetite
ready for our turkey dinner.

Then there has been the eating-of-the-Advent-calendar biscuits.
These have not always been arriving on the right days, 
so that sometimes we have had to force ourselves to eat two gravy bones.
The Madwoman is not very good at keeping track of the days of the week it appears.
We will be adding it to the already lengthy list of her faults.
Soon it will be time for us to help put up the Christmas decorations
- which we do, of course, need to prepare ourselves for, by taking a little nap.

Sunday, 4 December 2016

Feeling festive!

It was all looking very festive this weekend at Chiltern Open Air Museum.
Typically, the Madwoman's usual incompetence meant that
she got the opening times mixed up and we arrived an hour early.
However, that didn't stop us mooching around and annoying people
as they rushed round trying to finish setting up.
There were Victorians everywhere,doing festive things ...
there were some really lovely craft gifts ...
Not to mention a stand-in for Rudolph, being decorated by a reluctant elf. 
We rushed the Madwoman off to the woods before she got any ideas about
garlanding us with tinsel, paused for a quick kiss
under the mistletoe and then, feeling suitably Christmassy, 
went home to write out our present list for Santa.

Saturday, 26 November 2016

Window shopping

We went on a visit to the garden centre today.
We thought this velociraptor would look good in the front garden
And it had such a cute smile ...
but the Madwoman said we didn't get many visitors as it is,
and a welcome from this would probably
reduce the number to zero, and anyway, look at the price tag.

Alright then, we said, how about a nice cuddly teddy bear?

Singing ringing tree?

The Madwoman said how about doing something affordable?
And took us off to see a windmill instead.
Looking at it was completely free.
And we saw a mouse.
Yes, right there on the stair.
Although the Madwoman said it was our shadows.



Sunday, 13 November 2016

Feeling short changed ...

We had a parcel the other day.

When we opened it we found it
was full of a bulk order of Betty Miller's biscuits
 We did a bit of quality control,
and then the Madwoman said we'd had enough,
(how can two biscuits each be enough?) and put them away.
All 25 packs.

What, we'd like to know, is the point of having
25 packs of biccies - low calorie ones at that - if
you can't have a bit of a binge?
The Madwoman is such a spoilsport.

Wednesday, 9 November 2016

Out and about again

We're very happy to be out and about again!
We've done a bit of exploring new please-keep-dogs-on-leads walks
but today we had a quick stroll round one of our favourite destinations, 
We admired Leagrave Cottages, which someone seems to have 
beautifully gift wrapped ready for Christmas
... they seem to have got a bit carried away though as one of the horses 
appears to have been gift wrapped too.
Bet they'll have trouble fitting that under the tree on Christmas Eve ...
The we admired all the blacksmithery going on in the forge ...
and were dazzled by the newly repainted Maidenhead Pavilion.
Then the Madwoman trod on Angel's toe, making her squeak
and hop around on three legs:
injured and exhausted by all that admiring,
we decided to go home for restorative elevenses.